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My Yoke is Easy and My Burden is Light
Episode No. 77

Jesus said to His disciples as He tells us the same, ‘Love your neighbor as yourself’ Mark 12:31. We continue our series about Church Words you’ve probably heard and the meaning behind them. How to do choose to love people well, even when it is difficult?

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Verse – Galatians 5:14.
Verse – James 2:8.
Verses – Matthew 22.
Verses – Mark 12:30–31.
Book – Love Does.
Book – Everybody Always.
Series – Love Others Season


Josh – Hello hello hello where’re just 2 normal dudes trying to live this jesus life. My name’s Josh.

Andrew – Hey I’m Andrew and we are this jesus life podcast Josh my friend we are back and where in action how you doing man. How’s ah, how’s your week been.

Josh – Boom.

Josh – It’s been pretty good I can’t complain I’m trying to think what happened this week since the last time we talked I can’t think of anything ah pretty normal these days though I did cook some pretty fantastic tacos.

Andrew – Um, yeah.

Josh – On Sunday night we do a thing with our church called Sunday suppers once a month and I cooked some oh some Jamaican Jerk chicken tacos with like a homemade a mango salsa on top. Ah, it’s like to dream.

Andrew – Guys. Okay.

Josh – And then ah some carni assada tacos with an avocado crema I guess is a mexican crema because it had cilantro and lime in it but whatever. Um, that was absolutely tasty and amazing so much so that like I cooked a lot and I was expecting there to be a ton of leftovers. So I could eat them the rest of the week and everybody ate everything so there left me nothing to eat. There was some mango salsa left because I made so much of it because I’ve never made it before didn’t know how to do it but it turned out pretty tasty secret sauce folks ah Mango flavored or infused vodka that was the secret sauce to give it that extra. Just umph of Mingoey flavor put that on top of the jerk chicken. Oh my gosh. It’s so good and then if you haven’t had the carni assada yet from ah Costco that would be the best carny Assada that’s ever been created. Ah, it’s not cheap I think it’s like ten bucks a pound or something like that now. Um, thank you inflation but it’s ah so good better than anything I’ve ever tried to make or tried to figure out how to make it’s better than any marinade that I’ve ever bought that carni asada. Oh so good and it’s good. Meat. It’s Costco they always sell good meat so that’s definitely definitely an option. Now. We’re only let’s see here. We’re only two and a half minutes into this podcast and my podcast co-host here has disappeared I don’t know where it went. Um I did see that he put up the little 1 finger like give me a second but I feel like I’ve given him like a minute maybe even 2 and he disappeared. Um I would assume he can hear me still which is the only reason I keep talking um and he’s I think he had explosive diarrhea actually after I think about it. Um like that’s probably 90 I’m like ninety eight point two percent sure that’s where Andrew just ran off the he has explosive diarrhea. So if if you’re a pray in person which I’ll be honest with you I would assume that you are if you’re listening to this ju’s life podcast. Um, or maybe you’re just curious ah pray for Andrew right now and more importantly, pray for Andrew’s rear end because it’s probably it’s probably struggling right now because he was like he was gone quick. And I just I feel really bad for him.

Andrew – Dude you you started talking Carne Asada and I just ran straight to Costco at a ton and and yeah I took a huge dump. It was um, things got things got hairy. Um.

Josh – That’s fair like that carny assada is worth dropping everything you’re doing right now and driving to Costco and buying it if you don’t have at least minimum 2 packages of that in your freezer in this moment you’re you’re doing life wrong.

Andrew – Yeah, that will use. Okay.

Andrew – Yeah I’ve I got a palette a whole palette and anyway dude yeah you started talking about it. You mentioned it was a goscula like see ah I’ll be back. Um, that in my my three year old

Josh – Yep yep.

Andrew – Desperately needed a snack during quiet time and instead of having her wake up her sister during her nap time I was like I’m gonna take care of that so you know 3 birds 1 stone Costco poop snack done dun done. No not yet. Ah, when.

Josh – Do they do they share room. Okay.

Andrew – When my youngest is like sleeping most of the night we’ll move her into like ah just a floor bed or a bed on the floor. You know, um and then they will but that’ll be the moment we move our older one into a bunk bed. Yeah.

Josh – They call that a Matt and so sad.

Andrew – We’ll move her onto a yoga mat to sleep um all day. Ah no, so not yet, she’s still in our room but not too far from now she will move in there. It’s gonna be big. It’s gonna do big deal. Yeah.

Josh – Up. Okay, that’s gonna be a hard transition. How do you keep children, quiet and going to sleep if they can easily distract each other. Yeah, that’s gonna be rough.

Andrew – You don’t you don’t It’s gonna be dude. It’s gonna be the wild west like we haven’t dealt. We haven’t dealt with that yet. But we’ll figure it out. Yeah.

Josh – Before you before you do that like you should you should like re and like re soundproof all the walls put in like a soundproof door. So lese at that point it’s not your problem if you can’t hear it. It’s like 1 of those things like.

Andrew – Yes.

Josh – Like can’t hear. It’s not my problem I don’t don’t know what’s going on in there. Don’t really care what’s going on in there.

Andrew – It’s not. It’s not fully my like philosophy on parenting but I I want to do that sometimes of like I just I didn’t hear you. It’s cheerful. Yeah.

Josh – I Feel like it’s a great philosophy I feel like you’re missing out if you choose not to live by that philosophy.

Andrew – I will say so we live in the country as you know and my 3 year old is very independent and to the point where sometimes it freaks me out where like she knows like we have a big yard. She can go out back and like go and hang out by the chickens or like walk around but dude sometimes she’ll just straight up like disappear for a few minutes and I go out there and I’m like where are you like yelling for and then she’ll just casually walk around the corner and be like hey dad what the heck. Ah.

Josh – Ah, at least she doesn’t play the game where she think like she wants to hide and seek with you in that moment and not say anything and you’re like great I lost my child.

Andrew – Kills me right right? Dude I’ve I’ve very she she does that inside. So I’ve like very intentionally been like this is how you start a game of hide and seek. You always have to tell the other person like.

Josh – Yeah.

Andrew – You let’s not do a no a no ah no entry hide and seek like that’s that cool. That’s not cool. Dude any big ah other than the Carne asada any big weekend plans for you? Well, what’s ah, what’s coming up for you.

Josh – That’s fun.

Josh – Not much is super bowl weekend as we’re recording this. It would have already a passed and the Rams have probably won when you’re listening to this I would assume.

Andrew – Super bowl. no no I don’t want the went rams to win. Oh no, do you I think they do they went into Kansas City and beat the chiefs they held the chiefs to 3 points in the second half.

Josh – You really think the bagels have bengals have a chance.

Josh – That’s true. That’s fair.

Andrew – And overtime forcing turnovers doing all this stuff I mean the rams are like totally star-studded. They’re crazy, but the bangles have had like such an uphill fight to get here that I’m like I don’t know dude I think they could be right in it and I’m pulling for them because. I mean ah I’m always a fan of an underdog and I don’t like the rams um and it happens to be an Ohio team I’m I’m not like a bangles fan but I grew up in Ohio so I’m like come on now. Let’s do this thing you know, um, it’d be pretty sweet to see him win I’d love it.

Josh – Yeah, but like you’re also like Rams are also playing a home game which I know super bowl is a little bit different but I would assume there’s a crap ton of Southern California people like the second those tickets went on sale they were like I’m in. Um.

Andrew – True. Yeah, yeah, yeah I think you’re right? yeah.

Josh – I don’t know it’ll be ah, it’ll be an interesting game I don’t actually know anything about the 2 teams I know very little because I don’t fall football. But 1 thing I do find crazy interesting is the fact that 2 years in a rural row which has never happened in like the first year it never happened before in Nfl history that 1 of the teams playing in the super bowl.

Andrew – And.

Andrew – Right? right? 2 years in a row. It is crazy. It really is.

Josh – Is playing at home two years in a row that’s pretty crazy that that starts to get in the like conspiracy theory world where you’re like um, what’s the Nfl doing behind the scenes I wonder. Yeah yeah, which if it was still Tom Brady then 100% everyone would be on.

Andrew – Who’d you pay how much did you pay? Yeah, ah huh.

Andrew – Right? Big time. Yeah dude, we’ll see it’s gonna be good. You should go to our friend. Yeah, totally big time full on illuminati stuff. Maybe.

Josh – On the bandwagon of ah you know there’s definite a conspiracy playing at playing here. But I know we’ll see we’ll see I think I think I think the illuminati behind the super bowl.

Andrew – I don’t know man it is wild though. That’s that like never happened and then it’s two years in a row. Um, maybe they shifted something and how they figure out where it’s played or maybe not I don’t know I don’t know um, true. Yeah, big time.

Josh – Well, it’s a brand new beautiful stadium course they want to play it there and then Florida like who else? of course you want to be in Florida during you know february.

Andrew – Big time are right? February yeah, it’s the place to be dude. Um, what are we talking about today like what’s what’s going on I mean super bowl we did talk about that.

Josh – I Thought you were going to sing it for us. That’s what you told me before you were so excited I Thought you were going to sing the topic.

Andrew – You know I said I said I you started singing it and I said you should do that as our intro just sing song go through the bible verses.

Josh – That is not how I remember this conversation I heard it as I would love to sing it to get into like our church words for today and I was like dude if if you’re down like go ahead I think I think you have a ah voice of an angel and I think you should.

Andrew – Dude.

Josh – Demonstrate that to everyone that listens to us and you were like really do you think I could I said dude 100% you could so I don’t think this is the time to claim up I say you go for it.

Andrew – Ah, you guys and that’s exactly how it went isn’t it I’ve got stage fright bro I I just have the jitters and I can’t shake it. And pretty worried that it’s going to go poorly so I need you to sub in I need you to take my place like as as a friend this is the moment to shine for me. Josh is you take the singing part and I will clip it and put it on all social media for everyone to hear. Ah.

Josh – Dude.

Josh – How about this? Yeah I I bet I bet you would that’d be the first time we’ve posted social media and forever and you like it’s because draw shang on the podcast. Ah I think you should do this Andrew in your cold shower routine.

Andrew – Wait wait.

Andrew – Um I have yes yeah.

Josh – I think you should sing during your cold shower routine for the next week because I would assume you’re at 2 minutes now and I would expect for whatever the next topic is this topic is I was going to say what’s on the list but I don’t think that’s actually true. Um make it last at least 2 minutes

Andrew – Correct.

Andrew – Um.

Josh – Your song for it. So even if it’s like only 5 words I think like you really just you dig down deep and you belt it out for as long as you possibly can because i’mssuming if you do it in the shower with less oxygen like I would assume your body’s going to take in less oxygen because it’s stupid cold. Ah.

Andrew – Yes, perfect right? right? right.

Josh – When you get into norm. It’s like going into like you know going from altitude down to sea level. You’ll have all this extra auction. You’d be able to belt it even longer. So I think this is a plan.

Andrew – Um, and right? Okay, so that’s one option here’s another proposal. Um, if you if you. 3 times in the next week do 15 to 30 seconds of of cold to end your shower I will sing whatever our next bible verses about on the podcast live next time we record um to you have a week to ah.

Josh – How many times do I have to.

Andrew – 3 times you just need to do three days where you end on cold for 15 to 30 seconds each time. No no yes yep yep! So if you do that 3 times you win the water is.

Josh – For 3 seconds whoa 15 to 30 when do I start counting do I start counting the second I turn it from hot to cold.

Andrew – Go no use. You start the moment. You know it’s gold which is the moment you like that’s when you that’s when you know it’s cold. You go? Yes, yeah, everything becomes an Inny So if you do that in.

Josh – Ah, the moment you you’re your outi becomes an any got you got you? yeah.

Andrew – Like you just tell me yes I did that then I will sing the next bible verse for our podcast. Um, yeah, that’s the teal dude.

Josh – Yeah I don’t I’ll be honest I don’t think that’s worth it. Warm showers are just too fantastic and nice I don’t and the fact you you have to end that way. That’s the worst part of it all I don’t know it maybe in the middle of your shower. You’re like I just want to do it for whatever.

Andrew – And yeah, right? Yeah right.

Andrew – Ah.

Josh – But to warm back up after the fact would be really nice to get out of it. It’s bad enough that you get out of the shower and it’s cold in your house still like that’s war like I don’t no I don’t think this is worth it as much I’d love to hear you sing for everybody listening I don’t love it that much.

Andrew – I I.

Andrew – Okay, okay, all right? Well we’re back to plan a which is just to Josh what are we? What are we talking about I hope people I hope you enjoyed that tangent everybody and I hope the suspense was worth it. Josh is going to introduce. The.

Josh – That.

Josh – And if you didn’t enjoy it. You’re not, You’re not our audience. You’re not the people who are trying to reach because because you kind of like us. Ah so in the middle of this series but tell all your friends. Um.

Andrew – Ah, best topic ever. Um, if if you didn’t enjoy it stop the show now please just kidding.

Josh – In the middle series called church words you know these are things that you hear church people say are quote um and you’re like what the heck does that even mean and we’re kind of just working through the list and we’ve kind of been a little bit all over the place. But for the most part we’ve been in things that Jesus said so you know people are quoting Jesus. We probably should add some things you to Andrew of like just weird shit that christians say where you’re like what does that even mean, um, and talk about that stuff because like there’s definitely non-scriptural things that we like to like throw around. You’re like stop please stop? Um, we treated as truth.

Andrew – What do you mean? Yeah, maybe we should do that right? right? right? Yeah right? We could do that.

Josh – Um, but yeah this week so we well going back. We’ve talked about turning the other cheek we’ve talked about throwing stones at people. We’ve talked about but cheeks. Ah, we’ve talked about fishing for people um or fishing for humans.

Andrew – And and.

Josh – Which is probably a better way if you want a reaction. Ah and then this week we’re talking about loving your neighbor as yourself a topic that we have talked about on this podcast in extent ah in previous episodes.

Andrew – Right? right? right.

Andrew – As your smell. Yeah yeah, it’s important.

Josh – So we haven’t had an option or an opportunity to listen to older episodes. We have a series on him or what we called it loving others maybe something like that. Um, or we went through first corinthians thirteen um section by section and kind of talk through practically how do you actually live this out. Um, and we probably even talked about even more than that in other episodes. It’s kind of a big one. You know love god love people is is at the top of our commands. Um, as followers of Jesus um, but yeah, love your neighbor as yourself or do unto others what you would have them do unto to you is another way. Ah, that we see others saying it Andrew I know you love yourself a lot How do you How do you love your neighbor as much as you love yourself.

Andrew – Yes.

Andrew – It’s hard. Um, love your neighbor as much as you love yourself? Well, first of all little context little bit out of Mark 12 um, the pharisees had been like kind of peppering Jesus with. Questions and they saw him like really answering exceptionally well and and they were asking him questions trying to trip him up as many people did you know like trying to get him to say something that they’re like ha heretic you know, um, so anyway they asked him like hey which of. Which of the commands is most important. What’s the one most important one and Jesus says the the first one is the lord your god is one and you shall you shall love the lord your god with all your heart with all your soul with all your mind and with all your strength said the second is this. You shall. Love your neighbor as yourself. There is no greater commandment than these so they asked him for 1 and he’s like let me give you the top 2 instead and let me give you them with clarity. You know so like that’s the the order of things is love god first. Second is love your neighbor as yourself doesn’t say love yourself as your neighbor you know. So so first you guys start by like having love for god which is cool but is also hard or it could be hard. You know, um, maybe it’s a learned behavior. Maybe not I don’t know. Um, so start there and then move into love your neighbor as yourself. Dude it is hard to sacrifice for me ah time like I don’t have a. Ton of money but I have enough you know and like giving money towards something is probably a lot easier for me than like giving a bunch of time towards something these days with 2 tiny people running around that we care for my wife and I and um. And full-time job and all kinds of responsibilities like giving time to people is tough and that’s like that’s a sacrifice if I’m giving time towards something that’s like the the biggest thing I really can give these days. Um like I had to ah. Like ah this other guy and I were on a board and we’ve been needing to go and like gather materials. You know like do for something important I’m not going to go into the details but we needed to go and like get a bunch of stuff together and both of us are just stinking busy and like realistically.

Andrew – I could have been like hey like Mike would you please handle all of this yourself, but that wouldn’t have been loving because it’s a task that sucks you know and I have a shared responsibility in this and I’m like let’s let’s get it done. You know so after. After we set the date and moved it and moved it again and then finally reset it. We both buckled down and like last night we’re like okay, we’re doing this so we did and and I was glad we did but at the end of it I was like oh that sucked you know, but like I’m glad I did that. For Mike and I’m sure he felt like I’m glad I didn’t stick that on Andrew you know, but it was a small thing a couple hours in the evening. But even that can be hard to give and that’s for somebody I know well and have a ton of respect for a friend. Um, all that you know and it was over a shared thing and it’s hard. For me to show love with sacrifice of time in that simple way you know so I don’t think I’m there by any means of love your neighbor as yourself. Um, like if it’s hard for me to give up a couple hours in the evening. Ah, to do something that I need to do dude. It’s hard for me to love my neighbor anywhere near the way I love myself. Um I think in parenting this is the way that that it comes out the most hopefully in the way I treat my wife as a husband as well. Um, but man when it goes to neighbor. Level where it’s not just your direct family. Um, then it gets a lot harder to be like yeah I’m going to show you the same care and attention and love that I have for myself because that’s just not the case for me most the time it is extremely hard. What are your first thoughts like am I just. Way selfish is that is that your first thought or like I don’t know did that spark any ideas in you.

Josh – Yeah I think like um I I think for most people the idea of loving your and neighbor as yourself when you really start to think about it practically like how do I live this out. It’s pretty overwhelming. Um.

Andrew – Yeah.

Josh – Like I think that’s ah, a common response I would assume it’s a common response or Andrew or maybe it’s just a response for Andrew and I and you guys are much better people than we are but you know I’ve said this before like everybody’s selfish. Everybody is focused on what we can get um out of a situation whether we want to admit it or not. Um, like that’s the that’s the common mo so for us to essentially shift the framework that we view life through um to be others centric or others focused um like that’s a hard that’s a hard shift to make I think for a lot of people parenting is the first big shift in that.

Andrew – And.

Josh – Of like oh Wow like you know I love this this creature that I’ve created um and now I have to actually care for it like I think that’s ah, a rude awakening for a lot of people. We see a lot of maturity and growing growing up through that process. Um, but I think goes even so much farther beyond that. Um.

Andrew – Yeah.

Josh – And I think we’ve talked about this idea before but like it’s It’s really hard to love God It’s really hard to love others if you can’t figure out how to love yourself I Think that’s where most people’s stumbling block is is they treat themselves like a piece of shit. So of course they’re going to treat others like a piece of shit and I use that word word intentionally.

Andrew – Yeah.

Josh – Um, like if you’re overwhelmed by your insecurities and you haven’t dealt with that crap. Yeah, that’s going to be a burden to relationship with other people if you have it figure it out your emotions through things like why am I feeling what I’m feeling. Yeah, that’s going to have a negative effect a negative effect on other people. Um, and it took me really hard to be present with him in the moment. Um, and in a lot of ways. That’s how I describe like how do I love my neighbor as myself I be present with those that I’m in like in front of like how can I be fully present in this moment with this person if you haven’t read anything by bad. Bob Goff I. highly recommend it. Um love does love something else. He has a couple of books on the idea but his his first book. One of the things he did um to kind of prove his point was he wrote his actual cell phone number in the back of the book and said call me any time.

Andrew – Yeah.

Andrew – Who.

Josh – And then you know I would assume you’ve probably you’ve done it or if you’ve read the book or you know someone that’s done it. That’s read the book they’ve called and that in Bob’s I answered um I talk about Bob like he’s a friend of mine and I I don’t know Bob um, but like but the whole thing of his book is like he’s just present.

Andrew – Wow! Yeah, yeah.

Andrew – No.

Josh – Like to think through someone’s day like that you’re ah you’re a New York Times bestseller on numerous occasions I think he’s ah ah, he’s the ah like representative of Uganda to the United States so he’s like ah a diplomat essentially but he’s an american diploma he’s an american as a diplomat for Uganda.

Andrew – Yeah.

Andrew – Yeah, yeah. Um, yeah, um.

Josh – To the United States because he’s done so much work there I’m like I would assume pretty busy dude know some pretty powerful people. Um and yet in that moment. He’s taking the time um to to answer in in 1 of his books. He tells a story about an inmate that he found like he encountered um because someone called the number and then they got connected to this inmate guy and then. Ah, he ended up like helping this inmate guy out I can’t remember the whole story now in some crazy way because he just chose to be present in the moment like what’s god give throw at me right now and you know part of its priorities right? Your priorities have to change for you to be present in the moment and there’s things that are important that matter.

Andrew – Wow. Wow.

Josh – That maybe don’t matter as much as you put them on your priority list. So it’s probably helpful too if like create a priority list like where where are your priorities lie but then don’t use that priority list as an as a excuse not to invest and be present with others. Um.

Andrew – Um, yeah.

Andrew – Um, yeah.

Josh – You know we we like to use that often of like well these two top things are the most important things and no one’s disagreeing that those are the most important things but those aren’t the only things right? like there’s other other things that you need to be investing in and people you need to be investing in that that we choose not to because we feel like we just don’t have enough time but there’s probably things that can come off the priority list or drop.

Andrew – Yeah, yeah.

Andrew – Um, yeah.

Josh – Significantly lower on the priority list especially in the fact that Jesus said the greatest commands all of my laws. Everything the prophets have said have hang on these two things. Love god and love people we call it the great commandment. The great commandments. Um. Um, Andrew sorry I forgot your name Andrew Andrew read it from Mark. It’s also in Matthew 22 um, we see it repeated again should I just read it. Not that long ago paul in crap is it. It’s either galatians.

Andrew – Young.

Andrew – Um I don’t know or Asians. Oh yeah I don’t know I don’t know.

Josh – Google it. It’s either Galatians or romans I haven’t read Ephesians recently glaians galatians 145 um, you know for all the law fulfilled in this 1 word even if it’s this um you shall love your neighbors yourself. We look at the the big 10 great. You know the big 10 commandments. Um, that you probably had you on your Sunday school wall right next to the ah the felt board for all your you know felt characters to be told by bell story um, like the first the first four are how do we love god you know in the last 6 or how do we love one. Another.

Andrew – Yeah, yeah.

Josh – Um, everything’s built on these two things. So the fact that they’re that important to to God and they’re that that important to who he’s creating us to be um, like that’s where we should probably put those things at a much higher level of of priority than you know what am I trying to build right? like what am I um.

Andrew – Yeah, um.

Josh – What business am I trying to build what and I’m saying these things aren’t important but I am saying they’re not as important as other things like people because your legacy’s going to live with people not with the organization that you’ve built or with the business or with the Hobby or with the.

Andrew – Yeah.

Josh – Prestige or whatever you’re chasing everyone chases something? Um, but going back to the very beginning of what I said like everything hangs on your ability. Um to love yourself and deal with the crap of your life with Jesus like let him lead that process.

Andrew – Um, yeah.

Josh – Um, and you’re going to be blown away how much easier it ends up being to be present with others and love others. Well yeah, oh angel left us sorry I should probably keep this screen open so I can see Andrew when he takes off.

Andrew – Yeah, don’t worry I’m back I’m back? No no, that’s funny. Did it? um man it’s funny ice. Ah I so happen to jump to James which as you know is my favorite book of the bible. Um.

Josh – What really can we talk about that.

Andrew – Because something you said in there reminded me. But yeah yeah I just I feel like it’s the most relatable way of writing in the whole new testament. Yes, yes, and I’m like I’d want to hang out with you. James.

Josh – Because it’s so practical and how it approaches do you know there’s some there’s some scholars there’s some scholars throughout the days that don’t think the James should have been included in the canon.

Andrew – Yeah, totally totally. Yeah, it’s crazy I don’t know maybe they’re right? But apparently they’re wrong. You know if we believe this was holy Spirit God It got a dissension. Um.

Josh – Note Argue churches or says they’re wrong, but.

Andrew – Yeah, but maybe they just had faith and didn’t want to have any works associated with that you know and they’re like this guy’s 2 in my face I don’t want to deal with this but James in in chapter 2 he says if you’re fulfilling the royal law according to the scripture you shall love your neighbor as yourself. You are doing well. But if you show partiality you are committing sin and are convicted by the law as transgressors but he goes on to like talk about like how important it is to keep the whole law essentially um and I don’t know man I just thought it was cool I literally flipped to it as you were talking. And that line was what caught my eye right away and it I don’t know just perfect timing where I’m like yeah like love your neighbor as yourself is is vital but if it doesn’t start with love for god first and some love for yourself second then what are you gonna love them too. You know like it’s it’s directional I think because you start with love for god then some level of love and respect for yourself and then you immululate that. But back to the people around you. So I don’t know just super hard. It’s it is hard because it’s easy to um. Miss 1 of those vital first two you know, ah and and have it backwards or be you know thinking you’re loving somebody. But really, you’re just doing something for yourself because you’re out of whack. You know? um, but it like like anything Jesus teaches. It’s simple. But. Profoundly difficult you know something that requires us to live way outside of ourselves to do and I do think parenting for me is the 1 thing that has forced me more than anything to reevaluate. This you know or think about it differently because you’re doing things like literally wiping butts or cleaning up. Um you know, changing diapers or cleaning up. That’s right included my yeah.

Josh – Which which Andrew didn’t do before having children. He’s never wiped a butt including his own make sense of that.

Andrew – But like you know it puts you outside yourself where you’re like I love this person so I’m going to do this thing even if it is even when it is nasty or super frustrating or the most on your schedule possible of like in the middle of the night at the worst hours when you’re already exhausted like kids don’t. Operate on your schedule at all you know and nor should they like that would be crazy if it was like okay you can cry between 9 and 5 or whatever. It’s not how it works so it forces you to be like all right? How am I going to be a loving and good parent. Ah in this moment. When I am exhausted and I don’t want to deal with this in this moment or whatever like it. It forces you in a way that you know a friend relationship doesn’t force you that way very often. You know there are moments where there’s crazy circumstances and you you you know. Are forced to make that decision of am I gonna show love in this extreme way or not but most of the time it’s like small you know like am I gonna am I gonna reach out to that friend I haven’t heard from for a while and see how they’re doing am I gonna initiate a conversation in being open. To making a new relationship with somebody making a new friend. Um, it’s those small simple things that um, that lead you into real relationship with others and give you chances to demonstrate love or not um, but it’s not easy like especially and especially the more you have. On your schedule. The more responsibilities you have the more excuses you also have to be like no I don’t want to like make another relationship. Don’t want to have another person closed because then that’s more like demands of my time but back to your example with Bob Goff you know millions of people have read his books I don’t know how many copies sold of of love does. But I’m sure a crazy amount did I’m sure you got a crazy amount of phone calls and probably still does because of that. But it’s a powerful testimony to be like no I’m going to love people for real. However, we kind of connect. Um, yeah man I don’t know it matters and it makes a difference like it. It shows up differently than what is expected of the world. Um I gotta get my daughter back in her room I will be right back 1 more time I will hear you. So if you’re talking crap I’m not going to poop.

Josh – You know.

Andrew – Gonna get my 3 year old back in her room. Be back.

Josh – He’s lying. He has poop again guys I’m looking at his face right now it’s it’s it looks like this pressure building pray for him again and if you you can lay hands on andrew drive over and lay hands on him and help him through this moment. Um. Pick out on the poop conversation and I forgot what I was going to follow up with the Andrew one um shoot we’re talking about loving others that’s important. It’s not easy being intentional. Um see what happens folks like poop enters the equation we’re still all twelve year old boys on the inside. We. We we get off track so easily and distracted on the things that don’t matter. Um, but from a priority standpoint kind of just going back to that idea like man we’re so selfish and. You know when Jesus talks about dying to self and picking of one’s cross I think this is a big piece of that. Oh man I almost had I just almost had the piece that I was going to talk about and then I forgot it. It was like right there you know that moment got like it on the tip wasn’t felt like it didn’t feel like it. It was on the tip of my tongue. It was like in the side of my brain like it was coming in and I forgot it. But.

Andrew – Yes.

Josh – Um, like so much of of what we do as followers of Jesus is is learning to rely on on Jesus to shape us right? like and there’s a big piece of that that it’s it’s dying to ourselves. It’s dying to our dreams and our wants which I get like. Early on in your relationship with Jesus when maturity you know when the foundation has been fully built yet. Um, and you’re still learning this thing like that who man does that feel overwhelming like I remember sitting in in you know youth ministry I’m probably like a freshman in high school and them talking about heaven and like.

Andrew – You.

Josh – You know at the time hockey was everything to me and and thinking to myself like if hockey’s not in heaven I’m out like I don’t I don’t want to go to heaven if there’s no hockey. Um, which in the moment that’s that’s priorities right? that mattered so much to me that was the most important thing and if I couldn’t have that.

Andrew – Yeah, yeah.

Andrew – Um, right right.

Josh – And what would like what could ever replace that that would give me the same kind of joy. Um, but now today you know I still have a lot of my hockey gear. Um, or I guess new gear because you know 30 year old me today a 30 plus year old me today and compared to 16 year old me back then? um, we’re we’re not wearing the same gear.

Andrew – Yeah, yeah.

Josh – Um, but like I still have my gear and hockey’s still fun when I get an opportunity to play it. But it’s been years since I’ve put on the the pads. Um, but like there’s plenty of other oh I remember what it was now. There’s plenty of other things that um I could be doing that ah that bring me so much more joy that are aligned with you know Jesus mission.

Andrew – Yeah, yeah.

Josh – Of who he’s calling me to be and and what he’s calling me to do you know I think I’ve talked about this before but 1 of my life versus is John Ten ten um Jesus is quoted saying you know the thief comes and steal kill and destroy. But I’ve come to give you life and give it to the full and i.

Andrew – That.

Josh – I don’t know how many times I’ve quoted that in sermons on how many times I’ve quoted that to people but it’s probably in the thousands like I think oftentimes christianity can feel like death. It can feel like someone’s stealing something from you. Um, because we’re just doing it wrong like we’ve created a burden that Jesus never asked us to carry.

Andrew – No.

Andrew – Next? yeah.

Josh – Right? We’ve taken on sanctification as our our ability and discipline and will to will these things into existence in our character rather than letting Jesus do the shaping and how much easier that process becomes when Jesus is control of it. Um, oftentimes you don’t see the change right away. It’s you know you you know six months later it’s months later it’s years later even and you’re like whoa.

Andrew – Yep, a.

Josh – Or someone mentioned something to you and you get to this place but I am more convinced than ever in my life that john 10 10 that promise of I’ve come to give you life and give it to the full that happens inside relationship with people like you don’t get to experience the full life that Jesus has for you if you’re not. Doing relationship with people um like that’s where you’re going to make the greatest impact you want to have a legacy that lasts well beyond you know your last breath it. It happens when you’re investing in the lives of people around you like help them fo relationship with with g jesus help them fossil relationship with people and teach them what you’ve done. Like we we admire these people like you know Bob Goff and in the books that he does but the reality is we can all get to that level. You know, maybe we’re not all called to write a book on love. We’re not experts from that perspective. But we are though anyone could write a book these days. Um, but we are you know called to to be present with people to invest in people to make a difference in people’s lives and that’s where this adventure of christianity lies and I think so many people are missing out on the full life in Jesus is because 1 they’ve never. They’ve never learned how to foster relationship with with Jesus himself. Um, you know they’ve.

Andrew – Yeah, yeah.

Josh – Created new boundaries rules things that they have to do but none of those things foster relationship. Um, or they do those things with a different end goal in mind rather than fostering relationship. Um, and second they they don’t know how to invest in people’s lives around them. They don’t know how to be fully present. Um, for those individuals so they can love those people well and we’re not saying like sell everything you own and give to the poor like money is proven giving to the poor doesn’t work like history has shown us that we can give billions and billions of dollars and yet nothing happens should we had a story recently where.

Andrew – Right. Right? right.

Josh – Um I don’t remember what board at at I can’t remember the organization’s name. Um, and Andrew left me so he can’t help me um, come on people. What’s the word. You know where all the countries come together their bases in New York are there. You could probably all yelling it right now and I got nothing whatever that is. There’s a health organization attached to that. Um, and you know they called out you know the richest people in the world and said you know if you could only give this money we could solve world hunger. Do you know the answer Andrew he’s back.

Andrew – Yes, was it the un or WH o the world health organization. Yeah yeah, anyway, yes yes, that’s right, that’s right? Yep yep yep.

Josh – You Yeah, which is attached to the U N No I’m pretty sure it is um the United nations. That’s the word I could not think of um, we’ll get there folks. It’s been one of those weeks and it’s all almost over. Um we reach out to the you.

Andrew – That’s right.

Josh – Tag the richest people on Twitter or whatever and said if we could only have this much money we could solve world hunger and you know Elon Musk being Elon Musk comments back of you know you you show me the data and I’m more than happy to give that much money. But the reality is money doesn’t doesn’t fix people. Um it oftentimes causes more harm than than good.

Andrew – Depth.

Josh – But in the midst of that relationship investing in in the least of these investing relationship being fully present for for just the people you’re in contact with like man what a difference it makes for like people don’t feel like they’re seen today which is crazy.

Andrew – Yeah.

Josh – In a world where like so much our life lives in the public we’re posting everything on social media and everybody knows everything at least all the good things about our lives and yet we feel like nobody knows us like what an epidemic like we think covid’s bad. That’s 50000000000 times worse. Um, the fact that people don’t feel known.

Andrew – Yeah, yeah, true. Yeah yeah, um, and then.

Josh – Nobody knows who they are and part of that’s on them like they gotta take some responsibility for that but a big partial is that is like you know we we live in what there’s a term for this I don’t remember the term now but like you know we drive home. We pull into our garages we close our garages and we have no idea who our neighbors are like we just don’t invest in the people around us. Even people we call friends. Um, even you know some of those relationships were were limited on how invested we really are like they get a piece of us but they don’t get the whole us. Um, for whatever reason inseccurities fear um, blah blah blah blah listen go on and on and on. Um, but we miss out on so much life that Jesus wants us to experience and to have because we’ve chosen not to be present and invest in the people that are around us um and families. Yeah that’s where it starts your kids your spouse. That’s where it starts but that’s not where it ends like I think we like to use this as an excuse.

Andrew – Yep.

Andrew – N.

Josh – You know I don’t have any more to give but you do there’s plenty of people that do and then figure it out and figure out how to balance it together and it could be as simple as hey we’re gonna invite so-ands so over to family dinner. We’re already having dinner. Um my kids might be batshit crazy during that dinner but like whatever they get to see my life as it is I don’t have to put forward this.

Andrew – Right.

Andrew – Um, right.

Josh – You know, image of perfection I’m just going to let him give him a taste of of what you know my life feels like when my kids are being my kids like there’s that piece of it to look for ways. It’s possible to invest and be present with others I had coffee with a pastor buddy of mine recently and a lot of the work that he does is is around.

Andrew – Is dead.

Josh – This idea being fully present with people and and all that stuff but 1 of the questions and I think this is running around. Um um, like counseling circles right now. Um, and maybe it has been for a while and I’m just catching up who knows.

Andrew – Yeah.

Josh – Um, but the statement of you know when when you’re in conversation with people or with with a group of people and um, you can tell that somebody’s gone. They’re not present right now. They’re thinking about 50 other things. That’s not right in front of them. Ask you the question of asking this question in great love and care. Not as a judgment but as just a. A way to reengage the individual of just saying hey where are you right now which I thought was a fantastic question of like hey where are you right? now? um questions we can be asking ourselves in our own head when we’re talking with somebody you know are we saying hey you know Josh? where are you right now. And are you are you in this conversation or are you thinking about 50 other things I mean it could be even in that conversation. You’re thinking of end goals. So like I want to give this conversation to these two things which there’s a time and a place for that type of of conversation. Um, but in general. Like don’t be thinking what you’re going to say next or the next 5 things just be present in the moment which for some creates a lot of fear creates a lot of unknown creates a lot of anxiety what if I don’t know what to say next? What if there’s quiet or downtime because I haven’t prepped in my own head. Um. I’m one of those people like that’s my brain doesn’t think that fast inside a relationship typically but I haven’t experienced that fear like it’s an anxiety. It’s this imaginary fear that doesn’t actually exist whoa. You guys can’t see this but I can see this Andrew was gone. He was not on the screen and then he just appeared. And now Andrew’s gone completely and I’m just looking at myself I don’t know what happened to Andrew oh Andrew’s back I don’t know what’s going on I think Andrew’s still around.

Andrew – I’m here it keeps going in and out I’m here I can you hear me Josh I am here people. Um dude I’m sorry this has been crazy. Yeah.

Josh – Um, okay, it was like it was like the rapture but opposite g like like Andrew came back without like like you didn’t walk into the the the screen you’re just there was like a reverse rapture moment. It was.

Andrew – Doubled I came and.

Andrew – And I’m holding Baby Dale because her big sister woke her up during poop. Um, dude I am sorry I’ve been in and out I’ve been loving where you’ve been going and I’m gonna get my final thought in now.

Josh – Little mind boggling.

Josh – Freaking big sister.

Andrew – Only because I know where at our time we were supposed to be but I think it’s helpful to remember like this. What is love um, first corinthians 13 says love is patient. Love is kind. It does not envy. It does not boast. It is not proud. It does not dishonor others. It is not self-seeking. It’s not easily angered keeps no records of wrongs love does not delight in evil but rejoices in the truth that always protects always trusts. Always hopes always perseveres and that’s my final thought. That’s that’s how love looks and behaves those are all hard things. Ah, but if we’re gonna love others like those are the that’s what love looks like so that’s what we need to work on and in places where we’re selfish and getting. Upset about things because they’re not going the way we wanted them to those are flags and moments to be like god what’s going on in me, why is this making me upset and then from that place of of having some love for yourself after you have some love for god um. Then you can love other people well or you can start and start small because Jesus doesn’t command us to be perfect at things when we first start he’s just like here’s how you need to aspire to be you know and here’s here’s the path I want you to be on. It’s going to take you your whole life to get down the road at all on these. You know, but he’s here to help us god didn’t tell us these things and then just bounce out and say good luck. You know I gave us gave us some guide in the the bible with the holy spirit more importantly, with other people to challenge us and guide us along the way and I don’t know man. That’s that’s my final take is. That’s what love is so we should aspire to do those things and then to do those things towards other people even when it’s hard and especially when it’s inconvenient because that’s ah, that’s a little bit of sacrifice right? is given up. Something out of your day or out of your schedule or out of your time in the case I was talking about to show love to other people that’s that’s part of what we’re called to do so yeah man sorry been so back and forth and in and out on this crazy afternoon. But. Appreciate you bearing with me and I’ll probably rapture in and back out in a minute who knows but that’s what love is though? ah.

Josh – Yeah, and I would say this too like I get the feelings of you know, reading first corinthians 13 or you know reading some of these verses that that feel overwhelming of like man. How am I supposed to manage all that or how am I supposed to. Do all of those things that’s like 14 things 16 things listed there and the reality is is like it’s not up to you to manage all those things like that’s giving you a like that’s giving you an image of perfection of how we’re supposed to love people. Well um, but let Jesus get you there. Um, and I don’t know how many times you said it and how many times more we’re going to say it. But we’re going to keep repeating it until people figure it out. Um, like you’ve got to be fostering relationship with Jesus. Are you having honest, open vulnerable dialogue with Jesus um, that helps shape you into who god’s calling you to be. Right? Like if you’re struggling with patience. There’s a reason for it. There’s sin. There’s crap. There’s unmet expectations. There’s there’s a variety of different things that are going to be at play of why you’re not a patient person. How the heck are you supposed to know what those things are you? you spend time with Jesus um, you led Jesus. Foster those conversations as you’re reading through his word. Don’t read through his word as a task to be accomplished. So I’m reading a chapter a day. Um, kind of thing read it until it prompts conversation. Um, so you’re reading through 2 verses. You’re reading through a half a verse if it prompts conversation with Jesus jump off and and have the conversation with Jesus. Now I’m not saying neglect all of scripture keep reading it like it’s important it. It gives you a firm foundation of what god has already said. But if it’s not being used to help you foster relationship and foster conversation. Then you’re doing it wrong. Um, this is probably why christianity feels like a burden this is probably why christianity feels like it’s overwhelming. This is why when you read verses like that you think yourself, there’s no way I’m going to be able to accomplish all those things or do that or be that way or think that way or put others you know before myself in that way like yeah, um, you’re not going to be able to It’s the reality and the truth until you start letting Jesus lead the process like walk with Jesus in the midst of that see what he does um, let him speak into your life and talk about the hard things that he wants to talk about. They’re going to freak give you freedom in areas of life. He had no idea that those things were connected foster relationship with Jesus if it’s been a while. start start start today um it’s a simple of Jesus like I’m sorry it’s been so long since I’ve talked to you. Um I want to have a real blooming. Ah ah, fulfilling relationship and I’m missing out on all these things teach me how to do that.

Josh – And then the next day turn around and do the same thing pull out the book of John and just walk through you know Jesus ways as that is as as your foundation you could do that with a variety of different books. But John’s easy because it’s 21 chapters and if you build a habit in twenty one days there you go um. Goes against what I said earlier about just like it should be foster relationship Jesus but start somewhere um like be spending time with with yeah, be spending time with Jesus daily like you know relationships relationship whether it’s a relationship with a human being you know, think back to that. How did you build trust relationship with your spouse.

Andrew – You start somewhere? yeah.

Josh – Um, or with your your girlfriend or boyfriend or with your parents or with a child like how did you do that? This dissect those things you probably spent time. You probably were vulnerable. You probably gave trust away because it’s the only way trust is going to be. You know, developed in relationship. Um, like you, you. Here’s all the thing Jesus works by the same principles relationships relationship. Um, he’s going to function in the same exact way. Sure you’re talking with a being that cannot be seen I get that but he’s still present. He still speaks and he can still be there I mean he’s still playsd by the same rule. You’re not going to grow as a follower of Jesus. Um, on your own. You may be able to fake it mely do all the right things and abide by all the commands and then Jesus’s gonna say you know away from me for I never knew you like there’s gonna be a bad day on judgment. Um, like if you’re not foster relationship with Jesus those are the places you end up, but. When we want to see growth in our own lives. We want to love people better. It comes from that relationship with Jesus so use those principles of relationship and apply him to Jesus I got to spend time with him. It’s the only way I’m going to get to know him better and him get to know me better at least in the sake of the relationship he knows you inside it out but like. There’s that piece of like if you’re not spending time with them. It’s never gonna happen if if you’re not being open and honest in your conversation’ where do you think it’s gonna go if you’re not giving Jesus trust of like hey I know you’re telling you do this way I don’t really I’m gonna I’m just gonna trust you then? Yeah, of course you’re you’re still where you are that. You know as you were a year ago or two years ago and you feel like nothing’s changed yet makes sense. You’ve never you don’t spending time with Jesus and when you do it’s transactional like it’s not relational and you’ve missed on so much life if if christianity feels right like a burden to you right now I’m telling you you’re doing it wrong and there’s a better way like. Christianity my relationship with Jesus never felt more fulfilling than it’s ever felt my life than today. It took me a lot of years to figure it out but I want to make sure everyone else can figure it out as well. Like foster relationship with Jesus makes everything so much everything else easier loving people so much easier when Jesus is leading the process. Um, he’s dealing with crap of my life that I had no idea was related to how I love people. Um, he’s making sure I’m present in conversation and because he’s he’s dealing with other junk or he’s pointing out things that I just never knew about his character or knew about his character and relationship to me like let him lead those conversations and have those conversations be on. Honest and open which means like let it all out talk about your emotion god when I think about this situation I feel angry I feel sad I feel hurt I feel ah like I want to get vengeance I feel whatever the emotions are like let all those things out talk through those things. Um with Jesus to be blown away about what he can do with it.

Josh – Oftentimes we say you know lay it the lay it at the feet of Jesus laid at the cross and laying at the cross is like Jesus I give this to you that’s all laying it at the cross. They’re just making a ah a statement that’s barely. Ah, ah, ah, whatever the word is I’m trying to think of um, like. That’s just making a simple statement. It doesn’t make like it’s a declaration I’m like I’m just make a quick declaration. It’s like Michael Scott and you know the the bankruptcy I declare bankruptcy like that’s no, that’s not right? like that’s not no that doesn’t work. There’s some steps along the way.

Andrew – I Declare bankruptcy.

Josh – Steps along the way of giving something to Jesus is letting it all out Jesus when I think about this I feel this way Jesus when I was going through this can I just walk through every step as it went through it and what I was thinking about it the the fear that overcame me in that moment. The frustration that like talk about those things and why you think those things are the way that they are. Um, and then the Jesus watch what Jesus does that he speaks into those things probably redirects you gives you a new framework of why the you know why it ended up the way that it did um the part that you played in that that situation or didn’t play in that situation or how sin you know you know unfortunately someone else’s sin rubbed off you know on you and affected your life. You can talk through those things um like and man life gets so much easier loving Jesus gets so much easier living out this command of loving god and loving people gets so much easier when Jesus is leading this this process. So I’ve spent I don’t know probably 10 minutes on this soapbox because I think it’s an important sobox like get away spend time with Jesus today if you got a loud busy house and you’re like I don’t know how to do this. Some people can like get away in their own head. Great. Do it sit on the couch and get away in your own head other people need to physically get away. Hey on this I’m Goingnna have to I have to drive to Costco to get carny asada because this je’s life told me I have to buy this carni asada and Andrew already got his and it was good. Um, like take that 10 minute drive that 15 minute drive and say I’m not turning on music I’m not turning any audio books I’m not turning on any podcast. Okay I might turn on this July podcast.

Andrew – Yes.

Josh – But then afterwards just kidding don’t turn on our podcast and just say this next 10 minutes I’m just going to talk to Jesus and it may be awkward at first I’ll be honestly probably is going to be awkward at first that’s okay, that’s normal just like it’s awkward. Um, when you’re building relationship with you know your significant other. Um, and you’re in the beginning of that stage and it feels awkward to share vulnerable pieces about your life but you’ve got to be vulnerable to have real relationship practice these things and then on your way back. Guess what you got another 15 minutes maybe your wife’s like hey I really really want to go with you or you know your child’s like hey I really really want to go with you. Just let me know hey. I would love for you to go with me but I actually need some time with Jesus like as a dad think about that as a dad or a mom. How impactful is that going to be for your child when he hears. Oh I’m not credited sure they heard. You’re not, they’re not invited. They’ll get over it but like to hear that you’re fostering relationship with Jesus man. What an impact.

Andrew – Yeah, right, right? right.

Josh – That’s going to have on your kids now actually do it like if you’re not anymore like Jesus a year from now they’re going to be like yeah, that’s all bullshit. Um, that doesn’t work in life so makes you actually our foster relationship with Jesus some some change some credibility to the relationship but man, you’re me blown away at how full life gets.

Andrew – Yeah, right.

Josh – In terms of fullness. Ah Jesus promises in John 1010 when we choose to start letting Jesus lead this whole thing this whole life this whole process and the impact that we get to make on other people around us on the impact that Jesus makes on our own hearts and lives in the places that he’s definitely going to get us to go Andrew that’s the end of my soapbox.

Andrew – Yeah, dude it was a great so box. No man I Loved it I Love the practicality of like actual time and here’s ah, here’s a way to do that. And yeah, anytime you’re feeling.

Josh – You have any final thoughts before we close this this bad thing out bad thing this you know.

Andrew – Selfish or like I don’t want to do that for somebody. That’s probably a moment to be like love your neighbor you know, but love you Dude thanks for this time. Ah.

Josh – Those was weird. Ah so sorry folks I don’t know I did but hit some button and music started playing and then to stop it I deleted it so had all your files come off to figure that out but hey thank you guys so much for listening to Andrew.

Andrew – I Good to see my friend bye.

Josh – To see my brother.

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