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Turn the Other Cheek
Episode No. 73

“But I tell you, do not resist an evil person. If anyone slaps you on the right cheek, turn to them the other cheek also” Matthew 5:39 (NIV). We kick off a new season talking through famous things Jesus had said and then breaking down what they all mean.

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Verses – Matthew 5:38-48.
Verse – 1 Thessalonians 5:15.
Verses – Romans 12.
Verses – 1 Peter 3.
Verse – Proverbs 25:27.
Verse – Proverbs 25:21.
Verse – James 1:19.


Josh – Hello hello hello we’re just 2 normal dudes trying to live this jesus life. My name’s Josh.

Andrew – Hey I’m Andrew and we are this jesus life podcast coming to you on a Thursday Josh how you doing my friend. What’s going on right right.

Josh – Doing well they’ll hear this on Monday but yeah, that’s when we’re recording it recording it on Thursday today which I’ll be honest with you this week has gone so slow. It’s only Thursday it’s felt like it’s been six weeks already this week and we have.

Andrew – Coming to you on a monday.

Andrew – Um, yeah.

Josh – Full day to go so there’s that about this week but other than that I can’t complain. Things are pretty good. How about you? Andrew.

Andrew – It’s funny man you say the week’s going slow. Yeah by it was Tuesday night and I was talking to my wife from like Janet. We made it through the hardest part of our week it’s just like what but like dude Monday and Tuesday always feel like a slog and a lot of that is cause like. My wife has counseling sessions on Tuesday so like schedules are all crazy where I’m like stop and work early and jump it in and you know stuff happens later than normal. But yeah, literally Monday and Tuesday each week feel like a total slog and then from there. It’s like okay, hardest part of the week is done you know so maybe front loading it is good. Maybe not I don’t know but ah but I’m doing pretty good man I have a cold so I might sound funky so I’ll try not to squeak too much but my voice sounds all wacky to me at least so over here. With hot tea and cough drops and my heart is full and my head is also full of gunk so you know cold season. Apparently when you stay home for a year and you’re not around people colds hit you a lot harder than when you get them all the time. In a normal year. So. That’s where I’m at dude.

Josh – That is true. You should celebrate when it’s gone from your family like what’s what’s the go to thing that you that you want to like how would you celebrate something like that.

Andrew – And ah public nudity for me would be the big one just you know like finding like a nice open field to run through. Ah you know naked that’d probably be the biggest like personal celebration.

Josh – Ice. Nice. Nice, Yeah, it have to be a personal one because like if you if you did it as a family like you’re gonna scar a lot of people. It’s just not gonna go over well and then.

Andrew – As a family I think maybe just going out. Maybe yeah, yeah, that’s not that’s not a fambly thing to do no um, no, maybe just going out to to like dinner at a restaurant together again because our girls. Even though they’re little. They both do really well in restaurants and like man my older 1 loves eating in restaurants because it’s been like so much more rare through all covid you know and she’s three now. So she’s like thinking about that like I don’t know she loves eating food and restaurants. So yeah, keep it simple I would streak.

Josh – Yeah.

Josh – That’s fair. Okay.

Andrew – Alone and then take the family out for the good dinner somewhere in person. Um I I would I would carry a stereo blasting eye of the tiger while running through a field or subdivision. Ah.

Josh – Would you streak before that would you streak after that like do you have a schedule set.

Josh – A subdivision. Wow. Okay.

Andrew – In the nude and then yeah and then then from there I’ve actually never been streaking my life believe it or not from there. You know we’d transition into dinner and I don’t know if anybody would know you know what my warmup was but I would. Ah know why was fired up so ah, fired up a little chilly. Ah, it’s been frigid here man. Yeah yeah, yes.

Josh – Fired up in a little bit cold.

Josh – That’s funny I’m picturing a field like what’s the name that movie office space when he goes and beats up the fax machine or whatever copy machine. That’s the field I’m picturing like nice tall grass really frolicky which I would assume if you’re gonna as ah as a man.

Andrew – Ah, yeah, except covered in. Ah.

Josh – I Guess as a woman too If you’re gonna if you’re gonna run through a field naked you better frolic like there may be some hop to it like you want some movement if that’s the only way it counts. Yeah.

Andrew – Cuke out a frolic. Ah, totally man. Yeah dude, what do?? What do you do to celebrate. That’s equally weird as this conversation has been. How would you celebrate getting through the cold or. Covid or you know being promoted or one of the normal things people Celebrate. What’s your go to.

Josh – Yeah. Ah, probably like your daughter like I I love going out and eating with at restaurants one I love food and just time with people. But um I buy things is probably what I celebrate the most with though like I go to my Amazon lists and be like what can I buy to.

Andrew – Yeah, right.

Andrew – Yeah.

Josh – Give myself a patd on the back and I just buy random whatever things that I want to buy right now you know what I’m super into right now you and buy super into I’m looking to buy 1 but e’t actually bought one yet. So I’m not actually into it yet. But ah like retro gaming devices.

Andrew – Who. Um, what? oh cool, Oh nice.

Josh – So like you can get emulators on like things that look like the old game boy and then play all the Nintendo games and game boy games or you can get like bigger ones they’ll play like any nes games. So like you can go back and play zelda whatever the name of that one was the auran of time or whatever. Yeah, or like the.

Andrew – Um, dude way back in the day. Ah huh.

Josh – Mario one where you like run around that land. But I haven’t pulled the trigger yet on it cause it’s like two hundred and fifty bucks and you’re like is this gonna be a two hundred and fifty bucks project that I spend on and then I play it once and then I never look at it again or is this gonna be something they’ like yeah I could keep playing this cause the reality is I don’t play a ton of video games as it is.

Andrew – Yeah, that’s sweet.

Andrew – Right? right? right? Totally right right.

Josh – So it’s probably a bad purchase. But let’s be honest I’ll eventually buy it.

Andrew – When you have the right occasion to celebrate you know like don’t rush it man save it save it for something dick you know like yeah, save for something good. That’s awesome. Good deal man.

Josh – Yeah, yeah.

Josh – True. Well like I’m fasting right now. So I’m I’m already planning like what my first meals gonna be and he’s like you have staggered a little bit. But yeah I already know like I’m gonna get this at this place you like dreaming about it and you’re like ah this is gonna be a good day.

Andrew – Right? right.

Andrew – Right? Dude as you know I’m still watching survivor and even last night we’re on season 20 now which is a particularly good season. It’s like some of the best people through the last you know.

Josh – Ah, first bite of.

Andrew – Through the whole show competing altogether. It’s called Heroes versus villains and it’s been really good. But last night my wife made this awesome chicken and dumplings with leftover roast chicken I won’t go too much into it because I know you’re hungry, but it was a good meal and I.

Josh – Yeah.

Andrew – Declared for like the fourth time in two weeks that this might be my first meal back from survivor if I were to have a survivor meal like first homemade meal and Janis like you said that 4 times in the last week or two weeks and like we’ve been eating a lot of good food. Okay.

Josh – Really. Wow.

Josh – Yeah, you’re like well I plan on getting on survivor a lot So I need multiple meals. Do they still make survivor is they still making new episodes.

Andrew – It’s what I’m thinking about? yeah yeah yeah I it’d be multiple times. Dude there’s a new season that I think just like the finale just came out or like or they’re almost at the finale right now we’re not watching it live because as you know we have a. Have a wait ten years policy in our house for Tv it’s we don’t watch anything that’s not at least ten years old except for current day football and Jana loves to watch some of the bachelor or bachelorette shows every now and again. Um yeah.

Josh – True story.

Josh – Um, including and what Andrew’s not telling you is. He also includes that into his Tv selections. He only buys televisions that are at least 10 years old for example, at his house here in Colorado his tv I’m pretty sure was twelve inches mounted to the wall. So it you.

Andrew – Yeah, tube tube. Only.

Josh – I don’t know if you ever seen the tv show the office you know, but very similar kind of Tv you got to get pretty close to it to be able to see anything but you the hannahs. That’s how they rock. That’s that’s what they like like those old Tvs.

Andrew – Ah, ah, dude that was our downs that was our little downstairs Tv but it had that was our Dvd watching Tv where we would occasionally watch like Harry Potter or some other Dvd. Um, and have a little downstairs movie night. But yeah, that Tv basically is tiny like that we still have that somewhere in this house actually. But yeah, it’s tiny it’s tiny Tv

Josh – Um, in comparison to me I own like 5 or 6 televisions. So that’s just kind of how I roll and most of them are relatively new. Every single one of my rooms have a Tv.

Andrew – we’ve got 3 yeah yeah we’ve got 3 they’re all ten plus years old. My wife tried to.

Josh – And then I have two Tvs that are still on their box under my bed. So.

Andrew – Our Tv is like above our fireplace but on top of the fireplace mantle. There’s like space where you can put candles and our Tv has been burned quite a number of times at this so like the screen isn’t messed up but the very bottom of the tv because it’s like.

Josh – Oh gosh.

Josh – Yeah.

Andrew – Mounted on the wall. Very bottom of the Tv’s like curvy you know where it’s been like heated up and the plastics melted I keep giving Janet a hard time like you trying to set our Tv on fire. What’s going on but it’s not an expensive Tv anyway, so worst comes to worse. We’ll just buy a new. Ah, 20 year old Tv and we’re good to go.

Josh – Yeah I I had a candle lit downstairs I don’t know it’s some maybe it was last week but that there was a plastic plant sitting above it and I melted the plastic plant oops. Whatever.

Andrew – That’s funny, well dude now that we’re 10 minutes in what are we doing we we finished a series. What’s going on like are we just talking streaking and burning tvs or what’s the content.

Josh – Yeah.

Josh – Yeah I was thinking? Yeah I was thinking thinking today would be really good to like what’s the best way to streak like do you go full on out like in terms of like don’t cover your face. Let people know who you are or do you do you cover your face you feel more confident I don’t.

Andrew – Kind of be.

Andrew – Are.

Josh – Really up to you I guess but it’s probably probably worth taking the time just in case of the opportunity ever arises where you need to go streaking you know, like ahead of time. This is how I’m going to do it.

Andrew – You got to stay safe So K N Ninety five mask. That’s my only uniform in track shoes. You know some good some good running shoes. But yeah up to you know the mask kind of hides identity a little bit but you need shoes. That’s the.

Josh – That’s fair, yeah, you definitely want shoes. Yeah yeah, definite want shoes. Well and it’s one of those things too now like when you’re like 1516 doing it like it’s funny. Everyone laughs or like ha he’s streaking. But when you do it at our age I think it’s just a crime.

Andrew – Need it.

Andrew – Ah, right right? Bright bright. Yeah.

Josh – Like I think they just arrest you like it’s not funny like they’re just like this poor overweight man is running across the field and he needs to be tackled and Arrested. So. It’s just not as it’s just not the same I think we missed our opportunity to go streaking. But if you’re still at that age like streak away have fun at it. Um, enjoy yourself just not too much that it becomes an issue but you know I’m not have fun. There’s a lot of things that you’re like man I wish I did as a teenager when it was still acceptable. Not anymore when yeah now when you can’t blame you My Brain’s not developed yet and can’t can’t do that anymore. But.

Andrew – Not anymore. Not exactly exactly no.

Josh – Now we we finished up our last series we went through the the basics of just basics tenets of our faith basic theology of of christianity if you missed it go back. We we talk through the trinity we talk through salvation we talk through humanity we talked through the church in the last 2 episodes. Definitely worth checking out.

Andrew – Yep.

Josh – Lots of great and helpful information in there and I know Andrew and I benefited from it too. So if we benefit from it. We assume shoot others are gonna benefit from it that’s kind of our our our judge of success when we finish up 1 but this series we’re starting a new one and we’ll be honest with we don’t have a name for it.

Andrew – Yeah.

Andrew – Okay.

Josh – We’re trying to like throw around whatever and try to be fancy but they’re just like they’re they’re sayings that you hear Christians say they’re sayings that you see in scripture that people just kind of like throw out out there and you just got to be like what does that really mean things like you know, be the salt and the light which you know.

Andrew – Yeah.

Josh – Good good christianese terminology or things that Jesus said that maybe if you don’t have context could be a little bit confusing on on how do you actually practice those things. Um, so that’s kind of what we can go through. We’ll probably I don’t know how long this will go. We’ll go for a while and then we may have another series already in the hopper which for us.

Andrew – Um, yeah, right.

Josh – Big deal because we don’t plan that far ahead. So that’s a win so we’ll go into pithy sayings and and this week we’re talking about turning the other cheek and I’ll be honest with you when I hear the yeah when I hear the word cheek i.

Andrew – Turn your cheek.

Josh – Oh well I shouldn’t say only I 98% think about cheeks. So that’s just where my mind goes.

Andrew – I knew you were going to say that I when we said turned the other cheek and like how long till Josh brings up but cheeks. Ah so funny. Ah, it’s much fun of your cheek. Yeah, right.

Josh – It’s it’s a funnier cheek I’m just just saying like face cheeks are just face cheeks like that’s not funny and reading what Jesus said like you could apply to butts you know someone hits you in 1 butt cheek turning to them the other butt cheek.

Andrew – Right.

Andrew – Ah, my guess.

Josh – I think that I think it still applies the principle works but hey Angie you want to read kind of where Jesus said this and then we can kind of dive into our first thoughts. So.

Andrew – Yeah, this might be in the bible a couple times because it’s part of the sermon on the mount but Matthew 5 38 is where I’m starting says you have heard it said that an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth. But I say to you. Do not resist an evil person. But whoever s slaps you on the right cheek turned to him the other also if anybody wants to sue you and take your shirt. Let him have your coat. Also, whoever forces you to go one mile go with them to give to him who asks of you and do not turn away. From him who wants to borrow you or borrow from you so I’ll stop there that’s through verse 42 but this idea of of don’t do the minimum right is one way to look at it of like if you get hit in one cheek turn and and offer the other. If you have to walk a mile which I’ve been in church a long time and I heard somebody preach about that and it was like Roman soldiers would make people carry their stuff. Their heavy gear a mile and it’s like it was hard. You know so it’s like if that happens if you’re Conqueror. Makes you carry as heavy stuff a mile do two miles like do the hard thing and lean into it and do it as as an expression of like something’s different about that person. So anyway, what? what comes to mind with that idea of like. Ever slaps you on the right cheek turn to him the other also what do you think? man.

Josh – Yeah, um, easy said harder to do I think it’s It’s the human the human condition for us to defend ourselves and I think this is why this is so countercultural to to what.

Andrew – If it is.

Josh – What was going on at the time but like it’s not um, like this this idea I think is like embedded in the character of God like this is just who he is like you look at who he is and how he interacted with with humanity throughout the ages like this is what he practiced.

Andrew – Yeah, yeah.

Josh – Um, but like we see it in proverbs. There’s a proverb. What is it like something like you know if you’re it’s talking about your enemy but it’s something like if your if your enemy is naked or he’s thirsty. Give him a drink kind of thing. It might not be naked out of remember. But there’s a proverb about the.

Andrew – Yes.

Josh – We’ll find it and we’ll post it in the show notes. But so like it’s always been around. We see some of these principles with with some of the jews throughout different ages but you know at this point you know Jesus started that whole conversation with you know you’ve heard it said an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth which is.

Andrew – Yeah.

Josh – You know he’s quoting scripture there. It was a command of the israelites during those times but um and you know things have shifted and changed that we’re we’re now at a different place and part of that I think is because like we have a different connection with God So we have the ability to to persevere and endure at a.

Andrew – Um, yeah.

Josh – At a higher level than we ever were without Jesus you know the the spirit you know being a part of who we are so I think there’s that to you but Andrew like do you have a story that comes to mind where you had to practice this whether you were successful or failed at it. Yeah.

Andrew – Oh man, um I don’t know that I have a great story of turn the other cheek I have a good story of the opposite when I was a kid I Remember. Inverting the Golden Rule rule. You know like do unto others what you would have them do under yourself and I remember one of my like neighborhood friends hit me and I hit him back and we got in a fight and when I was explaining it to my mom.

Josh – Ah.

Andrew – I justified it to her because I said I said Levi wanted to be hit so I hit him and she’s like what are you talking about it says I said like do unto others as you would have them do unto you. He hit me so he obviously wanted to be hit and it like totally flipped it and I was like 6 you know or 7 maybe like little kid. Yeah, but I but I remember that distinctly because it was one of those moments where I was like sure.

Josh – That’s pretty good. It’s impressive.

Andrew – That I was right I’m like I can get away with anything if I just have this other people do it to me First you know, but ah, but that’s kind of the opposite right? like that eye for an eye tooth for a tooth was that it was like you know that in that old testament time.

Josh – That’s funny. So.

Andrew – More Agrarian like different experience of of who God is are not as personal of an experience of who God is in general it was like man if if moses your brother gets killed.

Josh – Um, yeah.

Andrew – By a tribe of people then your response should be go to go back and kill one of their own. It’s like like kind reparations. You know, not that like you you hit me So I come back and kill your whole family. Not that over it above but that like kind like you did.

Josh – Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Andrew – Wrong at this level so I’m going to wrong you at that exact same level right back because that’s what you deserve that’s justice. You know, um I think when when Jesus comes in he starts to unpack this idea of Grace and forgiveness forgiveness. That’s not tied to the sacrifice of.

Josh – Yeah, yeah.

Andrew – An animal person. You know like okay that sin was a small one. That’s a pigeon that you have to sacrifice that was a big one. That’s a whole cow. You know, like not not sacrificed in that kind but grace and like Jesus saying I’m gonna I’m gonna be the ultimate sacrificial lamb. I’m gonna take your sin up on me and in that way. All you’re sitting going forward when you turn to me when you confess and repent of it. Um, it’s wiped like it’s it’s gone. It’s Grace. You don’t deserve forgiveness but you get it.

Josh – Yeah, yeah.

Andrew – Like it’s the gift of god it’s a mystery of god to say how could you forgive this but through Jesus, it’s possible. So this idea of Grace I think maybe this teaching is is a way to start to be ready for that. You know because it’s not. I don’t think Jesus is saying when when somebody strikes you on the right cheek make him feel really bad ah by turning the other cheek to it. But it’s like contain your desire for justice and do something countercultural in that moment. That you might look different and maybe have the chance to even speak about why you’re living the way you’re living I think that’s that’s what comes to mind for me is that that story of when I was little and twisted all of this stuff around into a fist fight that I was certain he deserved. And then that that idea of grace that’s maybe underneath this is like it’s a chance for followers of Christ to look shockingly different than than the normal and have that chance to like 1 stuff down there. The air desires our desires and urges to. To make things right right away or to get justice like to push that down and say no like I’m gonna look past this deed and I’m gonna react differently than you think I’m gonna react and I’m gonna do that in a humble way but a real way so that maybe you can see like there’s something different about this person. Like I just hit them physically. They turned the other side to me and and offered it to what the heck is that about you know? So. What do you think man any stories come to mind for you.

Josh – Yeah, no, it’s great I think too like ah probably any stories that I didn’t choose to punch back. But um I Never really gotten like physical fights as a child either. So All my fights with words. And I just learned how to dress people down with my words. Um, but I yeah I can’t think of any stories specifically I should have and then you started talking it like triggered other things in my head. So I stopped thinking about it. So I apologize but I think too like I kind of going on the same lines where you’re talking about grace.

Andrew – Yeah, it’s.

Josh – I think the better we understand the grace that was shown us the more likely were were to practice this principle of turning the other cheek. Um, like I think of the parable Jesus tells about the the men that are the dude that he ah. The owner forgives his or not the owner but the debt collector forgives his sin and then he goes out and like chokes a dude because he owed him money you’re like yeah he didn’t fully understand what just happened for him. Yeah, so he turned around and did something you know stupid. But if he fully embraced and understood the weight of what.

Andrew – Yes, owed him way less money like much smaller scale. Yeah.

Josh – Was done for him that you know he’s forgiven and you know his family wasn’t you know thrown into debtors prison kind of thing that he would had a bit more grace for those around him at least we would hope that would be the case. Um, but like I think too. It’s so countercultural because this is how. Um, our society works right? This is how we even parent like you do something bad and there’s a consequence to the action. So when people do something bad to us. We assume there has to be a consequence to their action and if it’s not coming on its own I’m going to force the consequence to happen. So I think there’s that piece of like work. We’re constantly being taught this thing so that’s why that’s why it’s so countercultural to to this idea of how do we actually live in Grace and choose to forgive without you know, reacting without punching back without creating. You know some whatever consequences because we all do it. Maybe you’re not a puncher you know. You know someone harms harms you and your response isn’t to get angry and punch them. Your response is to get angry and and you know start talking crap behind their back or to get others you know against him so you go you know on the ah ah offensive and that way like there’s plenty of ways that us as christians do these kinds of. Stupid things and cause so much harm to relationship and because essentially that’s what’s happening right? like it’s it’s harm to relationship. We’re we’re not living the the the primary law that god has given us love god love people. We’re not living people anymore and and I think that’s a piece that that we start to. I think that’s a thing that we don’t spend enough time thinking about in terms of how are my actions going to harm this relationship. Yeah, we should be constantly looking to live in harmony with one another as as Jesus commands as Paul tells us. But this idea of like turning the other cheek like we find it through Paul’s writings like he. He talks about this idea in Romans he talks about this idea. Ah I want to say corinthians but I don’t think it is what do they just read recently? Oh ah thessalonians um like these ideas show up and I’ll as I talk I’ll Google and I’ll find these verses. But.

Andrew – And.

Josh – Like this idea of turning the other cheek or like not repaying evil with evil like it’s so important to the christian character that that you know Paul talks about over and over again first corinthians 155 um, see that no one repays another with evil for evil but always seek after which is good for one another and for all people then again in romans never pay evil back for evil to anyone. You’ve probably heard these versus respect the right in the sight of all men. Um, oh even in Peter Peter talks about in Peter three all of you be harmonious sympathetic brotherly kindhearted humble in spirit not returning evil for evil or insult for insult but giving a blessing instead for we are all called the very purpose. Um, that we might inherit a blessing I don’t know what version this is sorry but like like it’s enough of a principle that multiple apostles talked about it. Jesus put it inside of you know his infamous sermon on the mound which probably didn’t happen in 1 moment in time in thes sake of history. But that’s how we. We boarded it all together but it was ah it was important enough for Matthew here to record it in this way whichever is it Luke I think it’s Luke and not John that also has the sermon on the mound and it’s recorded there too. So like it’s an important principle for us and like Andrew you know, hinted to there like It’s so um, it speaks volume to our testimony for who god is and our ability to restrain and be self-discipline in those moments because of who god is in our lives not in our own power or will but but on god’s power and will in those moments and I think. I think you’d probably be helpful to Andrew like if we went like practically like how do we practically do these things and I have a couple of thoughts but I’ll hand it over to you first for.

Andrew – Um, sorry cough drop trying not to to make too much weird noise. Um practically 1 thing for me is that I’ve noticed maybe in parenting that’s a good example. A good way to learn this is that when I’m angry and I say the first thing out of anger that that comes to my mind. Um, it’s never helpful. It’s like if if my daughter’s being crazy and won’t lay down to bed. To go to sleep if I stand up and shout it’s time to sleep right now like as loud as I can’t that doesn’t help it doesn’t help relationship. It might make her scared. It doesn’t actually help with anything around going to sleep. It’s like It’s an anger response. You know if I let myself get angry and that’s on like a small scale day-to-day thing. But but anytime I use those first words out of anger. Um, they’re they’re never helpful. You know it might make me feel better for like. 30 seconds until I realize oh shoot that wasn’t actually good. Um, but in the same way like I don’t think I think following Christ is always better for you to like and I don’t mean accolades or anything like that I just mean that the way Christ. Walked and the example he led in the things he taught like if we live them out. It’s we’re going to have better lives like more fulfilled less ah challenging less angst-filled lives so in this, it’s like man. If somebody makes you walk one mile like if so okay if a roman soldier grabbed me and said okay, you’re under me so you have to carry this heavy stuff one mile Andrew because that’s what the law says I can do with no recompense like you just have to do that. Um. I I would but I’d probably my first reaction would be to like grumble do a bad job walk slower than than he want to be like passive aggressive about it like yeah I’ll do that minimum. But I’m going to do it real terribly so you never do this again. I’m going to grumble and try to. Slipin some insults you know whatever like that might be the the natural reaction but in that moment if if you take on an attitude like I get to carry this for you like I’m all about that. Let’s go to let’s walk three miles like let’s I’m gonna actually help you out with this. You know like I don’t know.

Andrew – Makes you feel a lot better like might not change the reality that you’re carrying some heavy stuff for somebody else for a while but that perspective shift at a minimum is going to help you. It is going to help me and I know that’s a fictitious example but bringing it back to real life like. In those moments where I start to be angry in my parenting um or feel fed up with something at my job or frustrated or angry with something in family like anytime I start to feel that rise. Um, this this like goofy. Ah, picture comes to my mind from one of my old bosses. She told me that her grandpa super syrian guy is because they’re Syrian but thick accent. He would always say imagine you’re a giraffe when you’re angry and that those words that start coming out of your throat. Have to go all the way up your neck like the long neck take your time with what you’re going to say when you’re angry because the key was once it’s said you can’t take it back but imagine it takes a long time to get up there actually think about it. And then say something and that image comes to mind often for me probably because we talk about gi draftffes and animals a lot in this house with a three year old um but ah yeah man like speak slowly you know in James it says be quick to listen and slow to speak. For the anger of man does not lead to the righteousness of god um, that’s somewhere in James one I think um, but it’s it’s like take your time in that angry moment and speak slowly and there’s some other examples that I could go to of like. Real life adult stuff that’s happened recently. But that restraint I think helps a lot because then you have time to actually think about like what am I going to say and is it just serving me ah to be angry and to put somebody else down in this moment or is it actually like. What I really mean that I can say a little better in a way that gives them the benefit of the doubt. Still even though I’m angry with them. You know like anger of man doesn’t produce the righteousness of god so all I’m trying to say is when you get angry slow down before you speak if you can.

Josh – No.

Andrew – And I’m not perfect at that but go slow because the things that you say in that moment you can’t take back and it’s a lot better if you don’t have to try to apologize for something. You said when you’re angry then to just pause for a minute be wise and react better.

Josh – You know. Yeah, no, it’s good and like walking away physically walking away is an okay response to to that solution or to that problem. Sorry um, like you I think it’s worth sitting down and this is good of.

Andrew – Yeah.

Josh – All practices of life but sitting down and figuring out how you’re going to handle it ahead of time. So when you get into the midst of it’s like practice makes perfect rights I mean in the midst of it. You just naturally do those kinds of things like it’s easier easier that way. But yeah I think all the things angel said are are are great. Um.

Andrew – Yeah.

Josh – Great ted bets and great advice to to live by um, to be able to live out this this principle um or this command that that Jesus gives us to turn the other cheek you know, not a lot of harm in most situations is going to happen if you take some time before you respond.

Andrew – Yeah.

Josh – Like you get that text message is just Whoo boils your blood and you’re like I’m gonna freaking let them have it Mar i’ma let her have it taking some time typically you know, always fixes things and even if you have to say that like you’re not in a situation where you can just walk away. You can just say hey can give me a moment like.

Andrew – You right? right.

Josh – I Want to respond in in a way that’s gonna be helpful to this conversation and right now I I don’t have anything in my head that’s going to be helpful. It’s only going to cause harm. But it’s a practice of of of limiting our pride right? like that’s really what’s at at at play here when we feel like we’ve been wronged in some way. It’s our pride that’s like well I’m gonna.

Andrew – Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Andrew – Yeah.

Josh – Freaking show you and there’s plenty. You know we all experience these things and all of us have failed at it. All of us have been successful at it like it all comes comes with the territory and you know I was I was thinking of ah an example like what happens when we do practice these things like can harm still like you know. Does it work out in the end for lack of better term like and I’ve talked about this briefly and in previous and I won’t get into super detail but like my last church you know Job. You know we parted ways not by well I was leaving anyways. But we part a way is much quicker than I I was planning on and it wasn’t my decision to leave. Ah, in that moment at least and you know the spin machine took off after the fact and created a narrative that wasn’t necessarily true that came out of that and I could have defended myself I had all the evidence to defend myself. Um, like I. You know I keep everything I have all the text messages and voicemails and emails and you know recorded conversations. We have all those things but in the moment I just felt like like I don’t need to defend myself like who cares it doesn’t Matter. It’s we’re moving on and you know now years later I’m able to say like it worked out.

Andrew – Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Josh – May be people that still believe the spin I don’t know don’t really care either. It doesn’t affect my life and hopefully it doesn’t affect theirs. But for the most part you know the relationships that needed to stay intact are still intact and they’re great and they’re thriving. Um, you know my life is doing great like I can’t complain about what’s going on in life like.

Andrew – Right.

Andrew – Yeah, yeah.

Josh – It it does work out in the end when we just choose to to live this life the way that Jesus calling us to live it as hard as that may be in the moment that you want to do something or you want to defend yourself or you want to punch back or you want to to cause harm because they cause you harm like it feels good. Sure maybe in the moment if you’re like I got.

Andrew – Yeah, yeah.

Josh – You know vindicated but in the end like it’s It’s not ours to take and usually it causes a lot more harm to ourselves. So if you just want to take it from a selfish perspective. It’s going to cause a lot more harm to yourself if you don’t choose to forgive and move on if you know if you don’t Ah, if you choose to.

Andrew – Yeah.

Andrew – Yeah.

Josh – To react and and respond back in a negative way. It’s gonna hurt. It’s gonna do a lot more harm to you than than the person that you’re doing it to and in all honesty. So like keep that in mind even for your own selfishness like it’s better to this like.

Andrew – Yeah.

Josh – God’s very clear and I don’t I’m gonna quote this verse but I don’t actually know where it’s from off the Google and put in the show notes. But you know god says vengeance is mine or it says you know vengeance is the Lord’s you know a vengeance is is mine declares the lord so don’t don’t get into the it’s old testament somewhere but don’t get into.

Andrew – You.

Andrew – That’s right.

Josh – Don’t get into the game of taking something that’s God’s responsibility. It’s not your responsibility and don’t get into the game too of like well God’s gonna take a event toial I’m just gonna wait here and sit here and and and and and steam until that happens because then you’re just gonna get bitter and angry because it’s probably not going to come as fast as you want it to come.

Andrew – Yes, yep.

Andrew – That’s right, That’s right.

Josh – It’s definitely not going to come in the way that you want it to come um like god’s going to show grace to them just as much as he shows grace to you? Um, so you know, learn to forgive and move on because it’s the healthiest thing for you as a human being as a follower g’s that can do like let it go. It’s probably not that big a deal in the first place.

Andrew – Yeah, yep.

Andrew – Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Josh – Life will go on things will get better. Not that big of a deal and you know keep those things in mind so from my own experience I Know things get better shoot. My life is a thousand times better in so many different ways than it was when I was still part of of that group of people but you know.

Andrew – Yeah, yeah.

Josh – Follow Jesus as Jesus has led and and if you’re struggle with these things and you find yourself constantly going to like Andrew said like the anger piece and that’s how you want to respond like have that conversation with god figure out why? Um, what about those things are triggering you what are things you need to talk about is our past hurt.

Andrew – Yep.

Josh – Um, or is there you know sin that’s going on that you need to deal with with Jesus you know deal with him. He’s more than capable and more than loving to to walk with you through those things too like don’t let things fester. It’s not. It’s not. It’s not good for your life and it’s definitely not good for lives of those around you.

Andrew – Yeah, yeah.

Andrew – Yeah, festering is never good and let me I know I gotta go in just a couple minutes. Sorry about that Josh I know this is a little shorter than normal but um, let me just say like if if you hear this is like the stuff christian shit say or pithy sayings. You know series. And if you hear somebody saying this as like a means of justifying continued abuses. You know that’s very different. So so and the few principles Josh and I laid out is like I hope in line with a healthy way to understand this idea of turn the other cheek.

Josh – You.

Andrew – Um, there are unhealthy ways to look at it and there are of course people who have used principles like this to do wrong to people you know, but but through the like the vein that we just talked about through the lens we just talked about of like this idea of.

Josh – Yeah.

Andrew – Being able to use that for a ah ah moment of Testimony of like wow that was so different that was totally not what I saw coming using a control of like I’m not going to let my anger response or my pride response determine my actions in this moment that’s something that sharpens you and then that. The forgiveness and and the grace that’s involved there. That’s something that is going to take your relationship with the lord deeper because you’re starting to live it out in in different avenues. You know you’re starting to understand these concepts in new ways and show it through your actions. So if you hear somebody saying that turn the other cheek as it means to like.

Josh – Yeah, yeah.

Andrew – Justify I I keep doing wrong things to you so just turn the other cheek I don’t think that’s what the bible means and I don’t think that’s what Josh thinks it means but people do say this like turn the I just turn to the other cheek you know and it’s like that’s a saying people would say and I hope.

Josh – Yeah, yeah.

Andrew – This has been like ah a healthy way to understand that as we we’ve talked about it I’m sure we didn’t get to all of it. But I but I think that was a good first attempt that’s for sure.

Josh – Yeah. Yeah, and I would add to that too like Jesus isn’t saying stay in on unsafe situations like if you know if you’re in an abusive relationship. It is 100 % okay to get away from that relationship whether it’s for for season. Ah for a season or forever.

Andrew – Right? so.

Josh – Depending on the situation like don’t like don’t sit there as ah as a spouse and think oh my you know spouse keeps hitting me I’m just gonna keep turning the other cheek. Absolutely not get out of it. Jesus is 100%. Okay, with that like your safety matters if you’re in a. Gaslighting situation if they’re manipulating in some way. It’s 100 % acceptable to get away from those things don’t respond. Don’t try to cause harm because you’re trying to defend yourself. That’s the point of what Jesus is trying to say like don’t take vengeance but it’s 100 % okay to get away and and keep yourself safe or keep your loved ones safe.

Andrew – Right.

Josh – Keep those around you safe like don’t give advice of like you know you know, go right back into it. He’s still your husband you’re like no, he’s an asshole of a husband and needs to learn something. It’s okay to walk away for for a season until things are figured out like make sure you’re always in those safe places now don’t use your safety as ah as a crutch the other way either of like.

Andrew – Right? right? right.

Josh – I’m going to leave everything because I need to be safe and this is just a not emotionally safe place for me like make sure people are speaking into these things with you and someone’s walking with you. Don’t don’t try to do things on our own because we talked about this few weeks ago. Everybody’s selfish including ourselves and we’re going to make decisions that are selfish in nature. Um, so make sure that that we have people around us that can speak truth into our lives. Um, when we’re living in this place of selfishness and justified all these things in our heads. So We think we’re in the good when all reality we’ve we’ve walked away from from what is right? And what is good a while back. So Yeah I think those are last thoughts turn the other cheek we’ll keep working through these we have things like love your neighbor as yourself. What the heck does that mean, how do I do it?? um.

Andrew – And.

Josh – You know my yoke is easy. My burden is light. What the heck was Jesus talking about. Um everyone who drinks this water will never thirst again. Never seen that water at least in the physical sense. Yeah, you must be born again. Yeah, all these weird things christians say come follow me and I’ll make you fishers and men right.

Andrew – Um, what Aquafina right? right.

Josh – That’s ah, that’s an image for your head. How do you fish for people. Um, and then be the salt and the light. Um and all these fun things. So we’re gonna try to cover a lot of these over the next few weeks keep coming back and hanging out with us as always. It is good to see you and you’re my friend I’m sorry you’re sick and not feeling well. Um, but I’ll be praying for a quick speedy recovery here on out. But for everyone else listening. We love you! Thanks for listening. We’ll see you next week

Andrew – All good. My man yeah t all bad Josh.

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